#bigfoot
No more tree whacking!

Who ya got?
#Bigfoot

Jinko the White Toothed Humany Looking Sasquatch is happy he found some Teeth Bleach in Matt Moneymaker's tent. Here he is with his one and a half coyotes. #bigfoot

I don't like to watch animals crap. Unless Sasquatches count as animals, of course. #Bigfoot

I suspect one of the rocks near the river is going to report me to the humans. He's a real rock-looking rock. You know the type. #Bigfoot

I just sneezed into a bucket. The sound attacked my leg and I had to shake it to avoid the heebie jeebies. DISCO! #Bigfoot

THIS JUST IN: Don't Squatch Call while you have red eye shine or your eyeballs will explode. #Bigfoot

I just stubbed my toe and screamed really loud. It was the best song I ever heard. #Bigfoot

A reporter for Gorilla Quarterly interviewed me yesterday. He said he would write his article on a picnic table today using his own feces. I hope it doesn't rain. I want to be famous. #Bigfoot

I finally found enough deformed fish to make this time machine suit. See ya in a million years, suckers! #bigfoot

Sometimes I pretend to jump in a dumpster before I go to sleep on the ground. You know. To make it fancy. #Bigfoot

Space seems like it was put there for no reason. I look at it and I feel important. Space is a loser. #bigfoot

Everyone thinks dogs are so smart, but they communicate by barks. Sasquatches communicate by screams and tree whacks. Check. Mate. #Bigfoot

"And the Lord Tree Rat sayeth unto the world: yea shall I throweth meteors at the dinosaurs, for now is the time of the tree rat." #Bigfoot

I bet the clairvoyant tree rats were like, "I TOLD YOU GOD WOULD DESTROY DINOSAURS WITH METEORS!" and got pretty annoying about the whole thing. #bigfoot