Real Conversations with my Kids:
MDMRN Twin 2 (10): A kid in my class called himself an "Alpha Wolf."
Me: Wow. And now what would you call someone who called themselves an "Alpha" like that?
Little MDMRN (15) / MDMRN Twin 1 (10) In Unison: Cringe.
This was not planned, but hilarious.
The kids are all right.
Real conversations I overheard between my kids:
MDMRN Twin 1: Almost all of the kids in my class are Swifties!
MDMRN Twin 2: Did you know most of my class hates Taylor Swift because of her boyfriend?
MT1: Bad boyfriend means good songs
MT2: So true
Me: Wow. I...I caught us up on laundry. I don't think I've been able to do that since we had kids. It feels really weird.
Mrs: (Kicks off her socks and tosses them in the hamper) Feels weird? Here you go, now you aren't caught up anymore.
This was a real conversation I had at Thanksgiving with my recently married brother (Bro A) and his wife (Mrs A).
Bro A: Beard looks good
Me: Thanks, it was even thicker than this before your wedding, but I trimmed it back to make sure it looked good.
Bro A: Oh?
Me: (Shows him and his wife the picture of my beard then)
Mrs A: (Widely smiling) That looked good, really good on you
Mrs A: (Turning to at Bro A and touching his face) You should grow your beard out like that
Bro A: What? No.
Mrs A: (Nodding aggressively) Yes, very yes.
#RealConversations with my kids
MDMRN Twin 2: Hey Dad-dew!
Me: Hey, what's up?
MT2: You know how Frankie from the new #MonsterHigh movie is #NonBinary?
Me: Yes.
MT2: Did you knw that the person who plays Frankie is also non-binary? That's so cool!
Sometimes I think the kids are going to be all right.
Tags: #Parenting
MDMRN Twin 1: I spy with my little eye something pink
Me: * Points out about a dozen different things *
MT1: No, not that. It was this
* She points to something very clearly not pink *
Me: Hey! That's not pink
MT1: What? Did you expect me to know colors?
She then runs away, laughing
I think she got me...
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Actual conversation from @gnitro's #Discord discussing #GIdle & Soyeon:
Nitro: It just sucks when she does the whole nasal crap... just be normal
Me: She can do it without being nasally. We have years of stuff from (G)I-DLE, her with #KDA, her guesting on other people's tracks (ex. Hyo) where she doesn't do it and it's great. Like...did she just finish binging #TheNanny & thought - yes, I want this voice now.
Tags: #KPop #Music #Silly #RealConversations
#RealConversations from my weekly #TTRPG game
Player: I have a few thousand silver pieces
Me: We've got a real William Jennings Bryan over here.
All Other Players: * Groan *
Me: 
MDMRNia: At school they constantly say we need to have good passwords online that are hard to guess.
Me: Yea, that's true.
MDMRNia: But then after saying not to just use a random word followed by a few numbers as a password, hat's what the school gives us. What's the word for saying to do something then doing something else?
Me: Hypocrisy
MDMRNia: Yea, that. That's the school
No one is safe from MDMRNia calling you out.
Tags: #Parenting #RealConversations
#RealConversations from my weekly #Pathfinder game that happens to be all Dads:
DM: You see small, dirty feet poking out from under a blanket
Me: So, we're running into my kids?
Tags: #Parenting #TTRPG #TableTop #Silly #DnD
MDMRNia: * slicing cheese into cubes for her lunch *
Little MDMRN: So are you...cutting the cheese? 
MDMRNia: * visibly annoyed *
Me: I'm sorry, your brother's 13 and you are cutting cheese. Expect #jokes like that.
MDMRNia: Why do girl's pants not have real pockets? I mean, you basically have unlimited pocket space. I can't even put a quarter in one.
Me: It's a mystery. Blame the Patriarchy.
Tags: #Parenting #RealConversations
MDMRN Twin 2: Wait, you use shampoo?
Me: Yes
MT2: On your head?
Me: Yes
MT2: But you have no hair
Me: I also use it on my beard. Cause, you know, it's hair.
MT2: You are so weird
A real conversation:
Twin's Friend: I really like Cookie Monster, he's the only one who really gets me
MDMRN Twin 1: He ate a glass plate once
MDMRN Twin 2: Hey, Cookie is a grown man, he can eat whatever he wants
And later...
Friend: When I am a grown up I am going to be rich and buy a 4 story house and give money to the poor
MDMRN Twin 1: Like me
Tags: 